Wednesday, November 24, 2010

i visited my maternal grandma (por por)@ the old folk's
home today. It's been a while since i've seen her.
When mum, sis and i walked into her room, her face
lit up, her mouth an open smile. It was so good to
see her. She's the cutest old lady i know. Really.
Her laughs are chuckles. When i count to take a
picture of her, she'll continue to count to 6, much to
everyone's amusement. And she loves it. She's still
pretty alert. Remembers our names, how we're related.
And that is very precious to me. Cos my paternal
grandma can't remember who we are even though she
lives with us.

I took pictures of por por, a few videos. I wanted to
remember her. I showed her pictures of my cats, of
my sisters. She asked if we all had boyfriends, or any
of us were getting married. That always breaks my
heart. I wished for her to be at my wedding. Really.
I doubt i'd make it in time to have her at my wedding...
and i'm pretty sad about that.

Time came to leave... but i couldn't bear to. All this time
we've been holding hands, por por and i. I couldn't bear
to release her hand from mine. When mum announced we
were leaving, she said, "oh, so fast?" man... i wished
i could stay longer with her. But i had to go to work...
I gave her a hug then left. As i walked out, my eyes
teared a bit. I love her dearly...

After the funerals of my grandads, i know how it happens.
We will be called to their bedsides. They will breathe
their last then there will be tears. The funeral arrangements
made in a room nearby. The people from the casket
company will come and collect the body. Then the wake
takes place. You see your loved one in the box. All waxed
up... Eyes close. Hands clasped. Then all you have are
memories. And the pictures. And if you're lucky, videos.
Then you remember their love.

No comments: